Mother's Day

 I find it ironic that on the one day of the year where Mother's are celebrated, pictures portray matching outfitted smiling children, and beautiful words are flowing freely, I am utterly worn out, exhausted, and not really interested. If I'm honest, it was all I could do to open my gifts and read my hand made cards with a genuine smile. Our toddlers had meltdown and attitudes like crazy all day. I took a two hours "nap" this afternoon that mostly consisted of half dozing while I dreamt of the 20 things on my mind. All day I have had to manually shift my heart and brain away from my son's biological mother who's heart is likely aching something fierce. I did a pretty crappy job 'showing up' for Mother's Day. I tried. I really did. But I just couldn't pull it together.

I am so grateful that I get to be the mom of these six crazy kids, but gosh, sometimes we have to sit back and call a spade a spade.
Motherhood is HARD. It is EXHAUSTING. And sometimes, it is just too much.

But, really, I am a thousand times more grateful that tomorrow is a new day and that children have the innate ability to love anyways. Despite my lack of enthusiasm for the day, every single one of my kids offered their prayers for me tonight, kissed me, and told me I was the best mom God ever made. Somehow these kids are able to see through my weakness and love on the greatness that they know that I can be. For that, I am grateful.

Happy Mother's Day to my own mama, my mother-in-law, my sisters-in-laws, aunts, and all of my mom friends. I have learned so much from you and am grateful that I get to walk this crazy road with you.